chingu123 7:43 pm on March 17, 2018
Tags: Because This Is My First Life ( 24 ), Jung So-min ( 24 ), Lee Chung-ah ( 3 ), Lee Min-ki ( 25 )

Because This Is My First Life – Ep 15

Well this was certainly an episode of honest clarification..for everyone except our couple that is.

I’m glad that Ho Rang and Won-seok were able to have such a lovely and loving parting..that was more than I had hoped for. It was much needed for them to both be able to move on..without guilt or sadness…and whether our over eager suitor is meant to be doesn’t really matter. Of course that scene between Suriname and her mom really hit all the emotional notes and was for her the final barrier that kept her back..it’s a long green light for her from now on..I’m happy for her!

Now that we know what happened 12 years ago I’m left scratching my head..I expected MORE! I wanted to learn about what it was that justified those hateful words..to know what HE had done..and I find that he had done nothing except to try to take responsibility…the deed was done by dad and he was as much a victim as she..in fact he became a victim twice..thanks to her. Now this is a good example of the power of words because she obviously had no idea how life changing they were to him.i wonder what his life would have been like if his father hadn’t kicked him out?

I finished the episode sort of irritated with Ji Ho..how dare she make my SEeHee cry..lol??? One of the things I always liked about them was that they were pretty candid in their dialogues and it was so refreshing. Now..she’s been talking to everyone else but HIM about the change in her feelings. And, I know that he’s never said the words but his interest and his actions..especially in the last episodes were so eloquent that I find her sudden behaviour puzzling and irritating..especially because she already knew that the poor guy intended to propose. She’s been patient with him till now hasn’t she? I just found it a little cruel..why couldn’t she have been as honest now as she has been in the past..all he needed was a direct question from her and not those hints and leading questions.

p.s. I love a drunk SeeHee..

#because-this-is-my-first-life, #jung-so-min, #lee-chung-ah, #lee-min-ki

yenchan69 11:18 pm on March 17, 2018

Yet another pointless separation.
I found much to be annoyed by in this ep., starting with Ji Ho and her inexplicable need to suddenly pack up and head out (to travel solo!)
1) Where did she get the money to travel? Waitressing in that half-dead cafe was so lucrative? At the beginning of this drama she didn’t have enough money to put a deposit on even the most crusty apartment. And she had a job as an assistant writer, which one would assume paid better than part-time waitressing (at least it paid her enough to help secure the apartment her brother ended up with.

2) She turned down her DREAM JOB for no good reason. ESPECIALLY if she was divorcing the dude anyway. Not only would she have control of her own show, she would be paid extremely well and she got along well with the boss. And she would get to WRITE. I can understand ditching the job to avoid conflicts with hubby (i.e. her REAL DREAM: TRUE LOVE), but no, she wants to travel solo.

3) Once again I felt like she was manipulating poor Se Hee. SHE was the one to wrestle their relationship into an emotional one, DELIBERATELY she did so, and now that the dude caught feelings she’s out of there without a sincere word to him! It’s like she feels that now that she has experienced love, it’s good enough, BYE. Who cares about HIS feelings, or doing the hard work of maintaining a relationship. She wonders about his Room 19… here’s an idea, ask him. Give him a chance to tell you, for fuck’s sake. Is he supposed to read your mind?

4) Also, that marriage contract went both ways. She needed a place to stay that didn’t require a deposit (that she didn’t have), and he needed the RENT. Nothing has changed. He STILL needs the rent, but she just ditched him high and dry. She says she can afford her own place now. Hello? He wasn’t offering charity all this while and she’s now doing him a favor by relieving him of the burden, he needs the rent!! Unfair much? So selfish! I just can’t agree with her methods here.

5) Though there was much to like in her conversation with the MIL, esp. the part where she says she doesn’t want to spend her life coaxing and pacifying a big baby of a hubby (u go, girl!), where the heck did that come from though??? Is she implying Se Hee is a big baby and too much trouble to coax and pacify?? Dude has bent over backwards to accommodate her needs since the day they met!! WTF was that all about?? She says he’s wounded and rightly urges the MIL to address those hurts and fix them, no matter how long ago they were inflicted… but then says she doesn’t want to be a cushion for him? WHAT?? What in heck is the basis for love and friendship if not to be there for each other when life whacks you in the head? A shoulder to lean on? A hand to hold? She’s like, nope. He needs to deal with his shit on his own. I’m outta here, can’t be inconvenienced. True love, she says. Sigh.

6) She didn’t EVEN have sex with the guy. You might THINK, one true love and all, she’d want to experience the whole gamut of it before calling it quits. But I guess all she wanted was to kiss a lil bit and fall asleep on him.

7) And what was the catalyst for suddenly wanting to take off, anyway?? It seemed so sudden, based on no logic I could ascertain other than the old stereotypical 2-year Kdrama separation. I will be waiting to see if this gets resolved immediately or if they’ll meet after two years and their nonexistent awkward relationship will just fall into place like magic, cheap and contrived.

Anyway, this whole thing was annoying and an affront to common sense. I hope the next ep will resolve it.
chingu123 8:19 am on March 18, 2018

tHaNK you Yolette for saying it better than I ever could….yes..I agree with all those valid points. Where DID she suddenly get the money to travel? That must have been a very generous cheque the cafe boss gave her! But the question is why now? Supposedly her only dream was, to not to write as we all thought, but it was to find love…guess what…she got both her wishes coming true…AND she even liked the ex! So what does she do? She leaves without a word of explanation and reverts to being a tenant as if the last few weeks of growing closeness had never happened! What a slap on the face it must have been for him. So now she’s decided that she wants to push him by this separation…but again..why? She knew he was going to propose..how did she know that he wasn’t going to declare himself and open up at the same time? She really has called all the shots till now now. Other than him trying to set some barriers because he thought that he was protecting HER, he’s been a wonderful and respectful companion. And..though I loved seeing him drunk..the fact that he was drinking indicated distress because of her decisions. I can understand that she might attribute it to arrival of the ex but that’s where we get back to the point…there has been honesty up to now…why doesn’t she just ask him to tell her? As she said to his mom..he is damaged due to the past..but if you’ve fallen in love with this damaged person..how can you kick him when he’s down? She’s not even being a noble idiot by allowing him to reunite with his past love because , a shocker, she did ask his ex love some hard questions…shouldn’t it have been easier to speak to him rather than a past rival? So irritating that she has everything beautifully lined up for both of them to be happy and she walks away…leaving him to the lonely life he had before. I have no doubt that they will have a happy ending but I think this was out of character and disappointingly very much a kdrama cliche..not what I expected from these writers.
Robin N 4:29 pm on March 18, 2018

These actions certainly generated a lot of heat towards Ji-ho when the show aired (and on the part of everyone who’s watched this episode since!) I would agree that it raises some serious questions about her motivations (and finances), but I’ve given it some thought in the months since I saw it the first time and my repeat viewing, so I’ll throw out some possibilities to consider (though I disliked the ‘need’ for the separation and all the other angsty-making stuff that transpired).

Let’s try the finances first. Issue: She didn’t have money for an apartment so she can’t have money for traveling. Well… this is probably the least problematic of the story elements once I thought about it. When you rent an apartment you have to put down a huge amount of “key” money (this can be upwards of $20,000 and for a decent 1-bedroom $100K-plus isn’t out of the ordinary) before you even pay that first month’s rent, so if she’s got a small nest egg of $1 to 2K it’s nowhere near enough for that key money but certainly enough for frugal traveling. When she gets back she’d be no worse off since she couldn’t afford the key money before she left and can’t when she returns but can always move back with Mom and Dad (horrors!)

Issue: She turns down the prospect with Jung-min’s company (even though it seems like a sweet deal and what she had originally been trying so hard to achieve). This does seem ungrateful and more than a little capricious when I think about how hard she tried to get lead writing credits for her script at the beginning of the drama. She seems to get along really well with Jung-min too, in spite of the potential baggage their relationships with Se-hee can carry. But… the time she spent with Se-hee as his tenant, just working at the cafe might have given her the chance to think more about what she really wanted and maybe she’s not so sure that being a lead writer on a drama (which is no guarantee of ease, fame, nor fortune) is what she wants after all as a writer — or if being a writer really is her heart’s desire. It almost seems too easy to get that project and have all her career problems “magically solved” by fairy godmother Jung-min, and maybe she doesn’t trust that level of good fortune — or her talent — and turning it down to test herself further to see if it really is what she wants and feels confident in doing is a good (if frustrating to everyone but her) idea. Plus, good rapport with Jung-min today doesn’t guarantee future good rapport once the honeymoon phase is over. WE know Jung-min’s cool now, but in 3 years when Ji-ho and Se-hee are blissfully happy with each other and babies?

Issue: She leaves Se-hee and the contract when she knows that the man she’s come to have feelings for has developed feelings too and wants to confess them and formalize their relationship. Arrgh! Why? Why? Why? Well, as much as I hate these separation stories, I can come up with a semi-reasonable answer for why this action has “some” sense to it. It all has to do with the word “convenience.” They came together not because they had any sense of connection (however slight), or had any degree of “simpatico-ness” other than a mutual passion for the same soccer team, a tidy abode, and an affection for a cat. When 2 people live together they can draw together because it’s convenient and it becomes a comfortable habit and this can potentially grow into more because of the laws of proximity. (They could just as easily have learned to hate each other.) She’d never dated before moving in with him, he’d not allowed himself a relationship in 12 years; you could ask the question what do they really know about ‘normal’ male/female relationships and what’s love or affection? I think that’s what she’s done — am I in love with him because he’s a wonderful man who is dear to me beyond measure or do I think I’m in love with him and he’s just someone I’ve become very comfortable with? Maybe a little distance is just what she needs to figure this out. She certainly doesn’t want to mislead his parents any more about the relationship because it seems to have come down to money and not love. She doesn’t want to live an arranged-marriage kind of co-existing kind of marriage. What she’s done so wrong though is to not have this conversation with Se-hee, and listen to him, and come to a mutual agreement on how to figure out their feelings. Another thing she’s done wrong is to not respect the shelter he’s provided her, both physical and emotional while putting her life back together. Now he’s got to figure out his future too.

But if all of this lets us enjoy drunk Se-hee (poor baby!) I’ll allow it — as long as he extracts his pound of flesh in the final episode!
chingu123 7:30 pm on March 18, 2018

Good try Robin..lol..good to have the time to ponder about these characters!

I could accept the money angle..though obviously she has no idea how expensive travel,is these days..lol..she won’t be travelling long till she runs out and has to go home to mom!

The writing issue is really interesting though because out assumption that she dreamed of being a successful was wrong..but if, as you say, she is still unsure what better way to find out and actually DO it..she’ll never know if she walks away and she doesn’t have to stay with Miss Cool forever..I don’t know..but she doesn’t resemble that girl that spent three months holed up with that head writer..or that girl who was so focussed on first head writing job..and the shine only wore off when control was taken away and the end only came when she was assaulted..but those were external things and had nothing to do with her supposed loss of passion or interest in writing itself!

Sure she might suddenly start to wonder about what her feelings were really about but it kills me that she was happy to speak to everyone except the one person who mattered the most. And if I accept that reasoning then I have to say that the actress didn’t get that script because otherwise if that was the case why …when she was leaving…did she ask him those probing questions with those hopeful eyes…looking as if..if he’d given her the answer she wanted she would have happily stayed?

Sigh…I’m still happy that there’s lots to say though!

Comments are closed.

We Talk Dramas All Day

Focusing on Asian and Spanish-language dramas and the people who make them

Because This Is My First Life – Ep 15